Unbelievable Squared

That’s about the best words we can think of to describe what happened today. We went to the high court to file a certificate of urgency in order to get a few minutes before the judge. Our hearts were hopeful that we would get an order, but we were at least hoping to get clarification for the judge as to how she wanted us to proceed. While I don’t think we should go into details, the net result was that we are still going to have to wait until April, and we will now be before the most feared judge in the adoption courts.

Too much for our God? NO WAY. It’s tough to know what He is trying to teach us or accomplish through all of this. We are not so short sighted that we cannot see that there is a bigger picture to God’s plan than our little lives out here in Kenya, but there are times when my faith shakes a little and my heart feels faint.

On Sunday, the pastor spoke about cafeteria Christianity. Sure, it was somewhat trite, but his point was good. He said that we sometimes act as if we can pick what parts of God’s plans he has for us. We want joy, peace, prosperity…you get the idea, but often we pray against the other things that God wishes to allow in our lives so that He can work His purposes through us. We ask that we can avoid persecution, suffering, pain…hardships of all kinds. In fact, if we all seek our hearts, we may find that the majority of our prayers center on avoidance instead of surrender. Perhaps I am speaking for too many, but recently, with so many of our current disappointments and fears, I find that my prayers are all about avoidance and rarely about surrender and acceptance. Of course, I am trying, but what a conviction I felt on Sunday.

I know that you must be feeling such disappointment and frustration along side us, and we thank you for your sympathy! But, above all, know that what I said months ago still stands: It is far better to be God’s person living the life He chose for you, accomplishing your calling, than anywhere else in the world. For me, that means it is better to be here in Kenya, heartbroken and frustrated as I feel right now, than home with all of you missing my current calling. Easy to say, understandably difficult to embrace. I am asking you, even now, to change the course of your prayers. Let’s stop praying for specific desires in our hearts: meaning as much as we all want this to be over, we should not be placing those desires above the desires of our Lord. Let’s begin to join together as a band of friends and relatives with one goal: Glory to God and an unrestricted flow of God’s purposes being accomplished!

Mama Sundi